….or so they say.
I’ve been feeling pretty lousy for the past 2 weeks. Mr Phua passed away 2 weeks ago. It was a shock to me ‘coz i had just visited him a week before he passed. It’s a constant reminder that life is unpredictable. He was a great man. Always thinking of others even though he was bed ridden and had great difficulties communicating.
Another hospice patient that I have been photographing went into a coma earlier this week. The family was planning to take him off life support as he has signed his AMD. I just got the SMS where the wake will be held. It was hard for me to say good bye to him on Monday. I knew that it was going to be the final goodbye. But it was harder to see how sad his wife was and for her to deal with the pain of facing his death. She herself said it, ” I thought i was prepared for this moment but i’m not.”
I’m sorry that I have to refer to him as “The Hospice Patient” but the family has requested to stay anonymous. It sounds really cold and distant. Hence, I would refer to him as “The Awesome Dude”. I’ve grown to really like the families that i have spent time with. It saddens me when i hear of their passing. Even though I’ve known them for a short 6 – 8 months but the intensity of the time that I spent with them makes me feel like I’ve known them for a longer time. It doesn’t help that life goes on as normal for me. Even though, friends have said that I need to emotionally detach myself, i think it’s only human nature to feel sad.
It’s probably not my place to say this but when things quiet down and I had time to think about it, I’m reminded that “The Awesome Dude” was a really really lucky man. His wife was one of the nicest ladies i have ever met. Ever so warm and kind. Once they found out that he suffered from a similar form of Motor Neutron disease that Mr Phua was suffering from, they treasured all their previous moments together with their children. The wife told me that they talk to each other every night until they fall asleep. Sorry that I’m sounding preachy but how many of us actually treasure the time that we have?
One of the things that Mrs Phua had taught me was to count my blessings. She was thankful that Mr Phua and her had 5 good years of retirement before he fell sick. If she can count her blessings and see the lighter side of things, who am i to complain about the little inconveniences in life?
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